As of this moment, as I type from my cat-sitting assignment in New York City, I am indeed still alive! Although, in spite of many opportunities for doctors to figure out what’s wrong with me, they’re still clueless. Once I have a dx, I’m pretty sure I can suss out a way to get myself to kick-ass status again in a physical way. But maybe not. All I know for sure is: I’m out of money, I’m still too weak to work, but I have 2 more weeks in which I don’t need to worry about finding a place to sleep or how to pay the minimums on my credit cards and student loans. This, my dear friends, is a last shot opportunity.
I hear you say:
“But haven’t all your efforts been last-ditch ones?”
Yes.
Over the past year and a half, I’ve tested out several different ways to add value to the world, and put a roof over my head and money in my pocket. I’ve gotten really damn good at the finding ways to provide myself shelter part. And no, none of them involved shacking up. (Shame on you!) The money thing has been trickier. Even commuting to do office work twice a week proved to be more exertion than my body could take. As a result, I continually find myself scraping the bottom of my bank account. There were times when checking my bank balances made me physically nauseous.
When I arrived in New York City in November, with a couple house sitting assignments booked, there were long gaps in the calendar where I had no idea where I would be sleeping. I also didn’t have enough cash to cover my bare minimum expenses for the time I promised to be in the city. So, I agreed to give God freak-out free time through the end of December. I made a commitment to have faith in Him, and squelch any bank statement nausea at the first hints. But come January 1st, 2017, I was giving myself permission to fully freak the fuck out.
More house sitting assignments magically popped up to fill the longer gaps in my accommodations. The smaller gaps in between were saved by the couches of my very kind and very generous friends in the area. You guys are the best.
I found ins talking with business owners and tried working with them to find ways to add value to their companies. Most of them were men who turned out to only want to talk at a mildly attractive female and not actually work out any glaring snags she brought to their attention. They completely wasted my time. I’ve marked and underlined this fact in my mental notes. One of them was a woman, and I was able to work well with her. I did add value to her amazing business, but after the trial run, I didn’t bring her in enough extra revenue to justify the earnings I would need. Bills continued rolling in, and waves of nausea continued rolling up from the bit of my pit of my stomach, but I consciously stopped them the second they started. The flame, that fear, was instantly and habitually doused. I learned to snap back at the inner whines with, “you think God can’t handle this? This is no big deal. He got you, relax babe. You’re being cared for.” And then, through logic, my faith would win, and the fear would dissolve completely away.
When 2017 came, I’d gotten so used to being at peace that I forgot to be scared. So, I wasn’t. But I was out of time and without any good leads on how to make money with a body that was once more completely spent.
Fuck. So, now what?
So now, the Hail Mary pass. Seeing the Patriots, who were so hated, and so obviously losing the Super Bowl go from zero to crushing the souls of Falcons fans everywhere gives me added hope. Maybe even a person who’s ill-favored enough to get kicked out of Ireland (of all the friendliest places in the world) can score a moderate victory.
My current house sitting gig in Astoria got extended to right up until my next assignment in Manhattan on Valentine’s Day. Suddenly, I had nearly a full month in which I didn’t need to frantically search for and apply to house sits. My bare expenses were covered. I had time. It felt like 15 minutes of overtime was added to my clock. How would I make the best use of it?
I could work on the novel I originally quit my engineering job to finish! But that’s only about a third, or 150 pages in, and I’ve hit a technical snag. In order to continue writing, I need to figure out some physics and power grid engineering details. (The protagonist is an electrical engineer — about time for one of those, right?!) That isn’t something I’ll have tangible results from when my OT is up. So, it’s time to think — not bigger, but smaller. I decided to write a short story and just put it out there as an ebook on Amazon’s Kindle. It’s time to test and see if anyone even gives a shit about my writing. Maybe I was wasting my time with the longer novel! Or maybe I will find I’m onto something and be able to benefit in small, but real ways very soon.
I began writing the evening of January 27th, and the goal was to have a rough draft completed by February 14th. I also decided that even though I was doing something short, sweet and above all quick, I would not do things half-assed. My LLC was still alive, although comatose. She could be woken up and used to publish my books, though. After a lot of searching, I found a free online business checking account with good reviews that I could apply to even though I was in New York, my LLC was registered in Indiana and the place my mail goes is a third location. That’s still in process, and I can blog more details on that later. If you’re curious, I’m trying out the free version of Capital One Spark business checking. This article is really helpful: http://www.carefulcents.com/capital-one-spark-business-review/
There are a lot of pieces to slide into place, but my goal is to publish and have it available for sale by the end of February — hopefully sooner. My current game plan is to do a pre-sale for several days at $0.99 to get reviews and bump it up a day after it’s ready to read. Unfortunately, if you have your ebook available for free for 5 days through Amazon Select to garner reviews, the reviews don’t count toward the paid rankings. And reviews are HUGELY important. So, if when the time comes, you can spare 99 cents, read the book, and like it, I’d be much obliged by a kind and honest review.
I assembled a team of 3 – one is an expert on the subject matter at hand. His main job is to make sure I don’t inadvertently write something horrifyingly wrong. The second is a man whose opinion on books and movies I hold in high regard. He also is incapable of bullshitting or sugar-coating. His job is to review for overall entertainment and enrichment value. The third is my editor for spelling, grammar, word flow, conciseness — all things mechanical. Her name is Rebecca Sutton.
When I requested Rebecca’s assistance, I learned that she does some writing, too. I asked her if she also wanted to put out a short story just to test how it would do. If she wrote it, I could return the editing favor and do the publishing. After all, I had to figure out how to do all that shit for my own book anyways. Her answer was along the lines of, “AW HELL YEAH”. Rebecca’s story is a feelz-inducing historical romance. When I read the short version of it, it gave me chills. I fully expect Rebecca’s sales to CRUSH mine.
You can check out Rebecca Sutton’s site here: http://www.rockhillreader.com/
I decided to share/document all the steps I’m taking in this process. Maybe it will be inspirational, or at least educational for anyone thinking of self-publishing their own ebook for the first time.
What about my story? What the hell is it? Well, it’s no longer going to be a short story as I originally aimed for, for one thing. I’m a little over half finished and already at > 13,500 words, which depending on your definition, will make it longer than a short story. I’m aiming for “novella” length now. As for the actual plot: it’s about a bloody, blinding, bone-dissolving, sinew-snapping plague taking over the world, and the boundless love of a father who will do anything to rescue his child. The working title is: Scourge of Sheol.
At my disposal are all the tools and abilities I need to follow this test through to completion. My basic needs are met temporarily. I have crazy momentum – I’m hitting over 3,000 words a day now, a record high for me. It looks like the reviving-my-LLC thing and getting-a-business-checking-account thing might work out — as long as no one asks my income from last year. I’ve got a team of trusted people to make sure I don’t produce horseshit. Plus, I have a bucket of discount, instant coffee, and 2 cats to keep me entertained with rousing games of “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?” See below.
Well played, Kitty. Well played. GAME ON!